Impossible to I'm possible
Greetings lovely one,
As I've begun sitting with my theme for the year, “a place of possibility,” a bit of clarity shimmered into full view. One of the concepts that I became curious about when beginning my therapeutic journey was either/or thinking. For what it’s worth, this dualism is built into Western thought and rationalism. The purpose is to separate, label, compare, and place things in neat little boxes. Unfortunately, that has translated into the need to control and create hierarchy, stereotypes, and othering. Putting that bird’s eye view aside, the entire “dualistic thinking” concept limited my belief in myself in terms of self-actualization and interpersonal relationships. What I could do morphed into what I should do. It was black or white. It had to be this way or the highway.
Now imagine growing up in a socioeconomic environment where there is a generalized notion that someone has “made it” if they become a star athlete, a famed entertainer, or intelligent enough to get that coveted full scholarship to become a doctor — no — the family doctor! Where did that leave us non-magical unicorns? Either/or thinking convinced me I needed to shrink myself to be … easy to digest. If you stay in that place long enough, you believe you are nothing but the limitations you’ve placed on yourself. Or you project onto yourself the limitations of another’s lack of imagination.
“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” Alice Walker
In my case, my stinking thinking morphed into mental health concerns that became so detrimental to my daily life that I couldn’t pretend like I was okay anymore. I chose the path of recovery when it wasn’t a headliner. And I continued walking it to places and spaces I’d never been exposed to. Enter the work known as decolonization and the resulting identity reclamation. And there’s a whole bunch of big academic words to let us know what we already know about searching for pieces of the puzzle that are the “true blue” you with all your quirks and idiosyncrasies. We are dynamic, we are in process, we are becoming, and life is change.
Sometimes, we get so wrapped up in our loyalty and devotion to the box we’ve placed ourselves in or that society has defined for us (or a combo of both) — that it becomes a shock to our system when the box is tossed aside or taken from us. No wonder we come to existential crossroads and age bracket crises at different times. It can be challenging to see the grand, colorful landscape when you are all caught up and tripping on the shrubs of your immediate surroundings. Another way to put that, to paraphrase a mentor of mine, is that it’s hard to see the picture when you’re the frame. When you are the frame, how do you look inside yourself to see what’s truly possible? How do you guide yourself back home to all of who you are? Previously people asked me: How do we actually live the questions?
I believe that we are all called to create. It’s why we are social, tell stories, and why myths and legends become guideposts, backdrops, and ideals of futurism. We are cocreators with the Divine. Living the questions starts with giving yourself the space to become curious about your role in the process of creation. During Black History Month, we acknowledge, name, and celebrate creators, instigators, and storyweavers of all kinds. We do this to honor their memory and legacy, to know where we came from, so we can believe in the possibilities of where we can go.
How can you continue to live out your role as a cocreator, seeing and believing the possibilities of who you are and the ripple effects of your lived truth?
Peace, Love, and Wellness,
Lynette
P.S. I’m hosting a soul-care retreat in picturesque Western Massachusetts with its beautiful mountain and river valley views. New England in the fall is absolutely gorgeous, and I’d love to create a place of possibility together with you.
Learn more and register today!
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What’s the Buzz? Here’s what’s happening
Available now: I’m a contributing writer to the latest edition of “Illuminate” — the only Bible study curriculum written by Friends (Quakers). Faith groups and communities all over the U.S. and some in other countries will be using this study guide in March, April, and May. So can you! Purchase a print or digital copy of Illuminate here: https://barclaypress.corecommerce.com/ILLUMINATE/Illuminate-Psalms.html
Ongoing: I’m co-creating stigma-crushing, mental health awareness merch for entrepreneurs and small business owners. Wear your support!
Click the image below to go to the store.
Community Member Kudos: Love Agent and colleague Dr. Jessica Aviva has recently launched the Fruition Journal, which offers insights and resources around creativity, leadership, and liberation. Best of all? It’s free! https://www.fruitioncoalition.com/fruitionjournal/1-1
Tales from the blog keepers
Did you know that February 13th is National Self-Love Day? Self-love has become a popular concept, but what exactly does it mean to love yourself? And more importantly, how do we put it into practice? Explore the concept of self-love and how learning to love yourself can improve your mental health and well-being.
Self-care may seem like nothing more than the latest buzzword or passing trend, but in reality, it is a commitment to ourselves — a promise to factor ourselves into the equation of our lives. When we optimize self-care, we feel better, look better, and have more energy. Quality self-care is linked to improved mental health, with benefits like enhanced self-esteem and self-worth, increased optimism, a positive outlook on life, and lower levels of anxiety and depression. Check out The Connection Between Self-Care and Mental Health.
After the recent death of Dr. Candia-Bailey, Dr. Heliana Ramirez collaborated with several BIWOC mental health professionals and allies on this toxic workplace suicide prevention resource.
Muse of the month
In full disclosure, this wasn’t technically my muse when I wrote the first draft (in January), but as I was typing this (yesterday), it popped up in my head, and I thought it was fitting.
Blerd’s the word
One of my favorite cosplayers, Tranquil Ashes, put together these awesome collages to celebrate some Black women and men who played roles on Star Trek as a beacon for diversity and inclusion. Via T.A. “As mentioned, this is just a handful of stars. There were and continue to be so many more!” Who are some of your favorites?